Crash Force Announces April 2017 Release, Early Access Jan 20th

Crash Force, a multiplayer arena shooter with RPG elements in which players pilot tank-like hovercrafts and battle, has announced it’s release in April 2017, with availability through Early Access tomorrow.

Now, I’m not usually a fan of multiplayer arenas. The only ones that have any real appeal to me tend to be either quite niche, story-driven, or they just… feel fun to play. They’re also more often than not first-person shooters. Overwatch, Hawken, and Counter Strike: Global Offensive (though far less frequently do I find myself playing that) are to name a few. Crash Force isn’t my typical cup of tea, so to speak. But Cyprus-based developers Ascanio Entertainment have made a game that I certainly wouldn’t mind trying out.

Players are given a selection of hovercraft models to choose from, each tied to three distinct factions with their own attributes. These models then each have their own unique abilities, and can be upgraded through attack, defence, and utility buffs. The Early Access launch will include four hovercrafts to choose from, while nine will be available in the full release. George Tziazas, co-founder of Ascanio Entertainment, said: “Players will immerse themselves in expansive customization options, tailoring their design and abilities to perfectly suit their play style.”


There’ll be four basic game modes that look to be pretty standard for this genre: Team Showdown (Resembling Team Deathmatch modes in other games), Capture the Flag, Control the Nest (likely a take on objective control or King of the Hill) and One Man Wolfpack (which is assumed to be a standard Deathmatch mode). The first three will have 3v3, 4v4, 5v5, and 6v6 variants, with One Man Wolfpack allowing between 6 and 12 players.

The full release will be available on PC and Xbox One, and the Early Access version will be (funnily enough) exclusive to PC, with a $29.99 price tag. If you want to check the game out, there’s more information on the official website.

Steam Link || $29.99 (Other Region Prices TBC)

The Real Heroes – Episode 5: A Very Special Episode: The Phantom Menace

Boot up your special edition DVD copy of Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace (1999) kiddos, because in this Real Heroes podcast special, we watch the entirety of Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace (1999)!

The Real Heroes is a podcast starring George Johnson and Elodie Cunningham, dedicated to seeking out and identifying the real heroes of gaming. Often minor characters and usually very strange, it’s an abstract and comical show that occasionally hosts guests.

Siegecraft Commander Available Today on Current Gen Platforms

Hello, Comrades! Siegecraft Commander, an action strategy hybrid developed by Blowfish Studios, released today on Steam, Xbox One, Playstation 4, and the HTC Vive.

In the single-player campaign, you assume the role of either a band of defence-focused knights and a tribe of offence-oriented Lizardmen, constructing an interconnected web of bases, with outposts becoming ruined and dilapidated if they are severed from the chain that links them to the home base. The real-time combat aspect of Siegecraft Commander involves taking control of a base to launch catapult ammunition at enemy bases.

Speaking of catapults, one of the most intriguing features of Siegecraft Commander is the base-building mechanic, in which you CATAPULT A BASE FROM ONE OF YOUR CURRENT BASES IN ORDER TO BUILD THE BASE. If that’s not crazy awesome, then I don’t know what is. These bases then connect through links reminiscent of the Great Wall of China.

The game boasts 28 different structures to build, eight levels in both sides of it’s single-player campaign, and 2-4 player cross-play multiplayer, a feature not often seen in smaller indie titles. Benjamin Lee, CEO of Blowfish Studios, said, “”From support for different playstyles, cross-play, and traditional monitor or VR setups, Siegecraft Commander is an open invitation for anyone who loves strategy to craft a flawless battle plan, steady their aim, and take out their rivals.”

The game will also support birds-eye view VR, with optional motion controls for aiming and firing catapults; this is where a word of warning comes in. As of today, the game supports HTC Vive VR, and a patch for Playstation VR will be coming in the near future. What’s interesting to note is that Oculus Rift (as well as Nvidia Shield) support will be available as a standalone version of the game in the indeterminate future. Whether this will involve a second payment or if the standalone will be free for those who have already purchased the game is unclear, so keep this in mind, comrades.


I’m definitely going to be pressing for a review copy of the game to give you all my thoughts, and demonstrate to the world the immense power of the GLORIOUS COMMUNIST CATAPULT WEB, so stay tuned! The game is also currently 30% off until 23rd January if you like what you see and want to pick it up cheap.

Steam Link || RRP: $19.99/£14.99/€19.99

The Gameographers – Episode 5: Once Upon a Time I Had a Penis (Feat @LauraKBuzz)

On this episode of the Gameographers, we’re joined by special guest Laura Kate Dale, ex-UK Editor of Destructoid, and current co-EIC of LetsPlayVideoGames. We have a big lengthy discussion about the stunning visual novel by Christine Love, Ladykiller in a Bind.

Gameographers is a podcast starring Jed Whitaker, Alissa McAloon, and George Johnson. The trio (with the occasional guest) play pornographic video games and discuss their thoughts and experiences, as well as their views on each episode’s kink of the week(ish).

Constructor Confirmed for Nintendo Switch Day One Launch

Constructor, a construction and management sim with humorous undertones originally released in 1997 for MS-DOS, has been confirmed as a day one launch title for the Nintendo Switch, with a UK release date of 3rd March.


The announcement marks the 20th anniversary of the game, which is also set for re-release on PS4, Xbox One and Steam on 28th February. In a press release from Decibel PR, CEO of System 3 Mark Cale said: “The drive and ambition to bring products to the world’s most dynamic gaming systems has stood System 3 in good stead over it’s 35-year existence. The Nintendo Switch is the latest example of hardware allowing us to bring our unique vision to the market.”

With it’s Switch release, Constructor will support wireless play, with up to four players able to compete against each other in various challenges. System 3 highlight the Switch’s portability as a major element of the re-release: “Caught short and need to lay some pipe during Constructor? Undock your Nintendo Switch™, take your place on the porcelain throne, and continue building your empire in uninterrupted comfort. Just remember to flush.”


Constructor is one of a few third-party announcements for the Switch that leaves us hopeful for quite an extensive library for the upcoming console. Such games include Triple-A games like Sonic ManiaThe Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim, and Dragon Ball Xenoverse 2, as well as some popular indies including Yooka-LayleeThe Binding of Isaac: Afterbirth, and Shovel Knight.

It’s nice to see some veterans of the games development keeping up to date with where the industry is today. I’ve never had the chance to try out Constructor, but this new release on current platforms gives me all the more reason to try it out.

Why Santa is a Luxury Space Communist

I was playing Bully: Scholarship Edition the other day (the best Rockstar game) and I encountered Rudy the homeless Santa. And, in this festive season, it got me thinking a lot about the large, jolly man who knows if you’re naughty or nice, when it clicked; there is undeniable evidence that Santa Claus is not only a Communist, but a Luxury Space Communist. Here’s why, with some complimentary listening material.


He Wears Red

santa communist red.jpg

As we all know, Santa wears red. This is allegedly (though it has been disputed) due to marketing à la the EVIL CAPITALIST Coca-Cola Corporation. If that is the case, it’s a move that backfired on them, as the colour red is one that is explicitly associated with left-leaning politics, especially that of Communism. Just look at the USSR flag, for Marx’s sake! It’s big, it’s red, and Santa’s get-up would easily blend in as effective camouflage if stood in front of it, which definitely means he’s a Communist.


He Distributes Free Presents

santa presents.jpg

What are two big aspects of a Communist utopia? No currency, and equal distribution of goods. Santa gives out presents to all the good children in the world, free of charge. However, these gifts could be considered luxuries, and often are. That’s where Luxury Space Communism comes in, as part of the ideology is the automation of all of life’s necessities and luxuries. As such, Santa’s gifting tendencies could be considered to fall under this umbrella of Red society.


His Sleigh is Powered by Space-age Technology

santa space communist.png

Santa is able to dash across the whole earth to give presents, all in a single night. Is this magic? Nay, I say! Clearly, the explanation behind this seemingly impossible feat is that Santa’s sleigh is a spaceship, and that Santa is actually a gift-giving cosmonaut. His reindeer are probably cybernetic automatons that serve to add to Santa’s winter aesthetic, and the sleigh likely has either a Warp or an FTL drive, or some variation of the sort, that allows him to travel so very quickly across the globe.


His Elves Work for Free

santa gulag.jpg

There are two explanations to this one. Either, the elves are a collective workforce, producing manual labour for the betterment of mankind, with their needs supplied in return, such as food, water, and shelter, in an implementation of Marx’s quote, “From each according to his ability, to each according to his needs.” The other explanation is that the elves lived lives of decadence and debauchery at the sacrifice of the freedoms of the lower working classes, and are now in a sort of festive Gulag.


He Knows if You’ve Been Bad or Good

santa kgb.jpg

In less savoury implementations of a Communist state, such as Stalin’s Soviet Russia, there existed a form of secret police, in this instance the KGB. They kept watch on citizens, and weeded out political dissidents and proclaimed enemies of the state. But what if this were to be used for good? What if Santa has his own “secret police,” tasked with monitoring the morality of all children so to establish how naughty or nice they’ve been, and whether they are gifted with luxuries or merely given coal?


He Looks a Bit Like Karl Marx

santa and karl marx.png

I mean, come on. The resemblance is uncanny! They both have big, white, bushy beards, and they, uh, they both look cuddly?


There you have it, blatant proof of Santa’s affiliation and quite successful implementation of the people’s ideology. What do you think? Are there any other overwhelming pieces of evidence to note of Santa’s far-left political affiliation? Let me know in the comments!

Neopolis – Concept Art Released for New Cyberpunk RTS

Yesterday, Omni Systems released some really funky concept art for Neopolis, an upcoming Cyberpunk RTS scheduled for release on Playstation 4 and PC in 2017.

The concept art looks colourful, gaudy, and exciting, with cited inspirations from old hip-hop crews, Ghost in the ShellAkiraBlade Runner, and the gangs from The Warriors. This aesthetic will aid in the telling of a story in which gangs and crews wage battle in a globally-televised game of e-combat.

Omni Systems claim “a non-traditional approach to strategy gameplay,” taking elements like tech tree exploration, base-building, unit construction and resource gathering, stating that they will pre-integrate the features into the neon city in which the game is set.

Rudolf Kremers, the director of Omni Systems, has had quite a prolific background, working on Hitchhiker’s Guide to the GalaxyDeadlight, and Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, as well as receiving a BAFTA nomination for Eufloria, his first release as an independent developer.

Prior to seeing this unveiled concept art, I hadn’t actually heard of Neopolis, but I’m definitely keeping a close eye on the game now, as I don’t think I’ve ever seen anything else with such a distinct and funky aesthetic.